He's trying, okay? Honestly, with all the pressure on them, he doesn't know if he'll have much more of a chance to have moments like these with Connor. That spiteful part of his brain tries to wander off, tries to remind him that he only has a few months for this. That he might end up with a replacement before Connor does, and he might not even realize it at first. That if they make it home, they might even spend the rest of their lives on the run, never able to quite afford a nice event again.

He bites down the thoughts, but for a few seconds he does hold Connor a little tighter. His smile fades slightly to something somber, wistful. But he doesn't voice those thoughts and he doesn't do anything to encourage Connor to dip into it like uncomfortably chilly water. He just has to drag his own damn self back out.